When we talk about the problems of infighting and bullying in social justice communities, when we talk about how some people (myself included) frequently feel alienated by the very movements that are supposed to help us, when we try to have discussions about what we can do about this problem and how we can build better anti-oppression frameworks and practices…
That is NOT “blaming women for anti-feminism”. Or “blaming trans people for transphobia”. Or “blaming autistic people for neurobigotry”. Or whatever.
And if you seriously don’t see the difference, if you really can’t wrap your head around the nuance there, well, then, I suggest trying to be less self-righteously reactionary and actually listening to what we’ve been saying.
(ETA: I’m not saying that people don’t blame the oppressed for their oppressions; I know it happens all the time. I’m saying, that’s not what this is.)