“Why aren’t you angry?”
Because I’m fucking exhausted, that’s why. Depression means I don’t have much energy to begin with, and I have to use most of what I do have for school, work and social situations, which doesn’t leave much over to do activism or to be angry about shit. Oh, and I’m also trans, which means I have to constantly fight just to be seen as human (and usually fail). And I try to squeeze creative projects in amidst all this because that’s how I keep from killing myself.
So I will probably never be a good enough activist for you. And I’m a lot more okay with that than you might think. Yeah, I know; I’m not angry so I’m not helping, and that automatically makes me Part of the Problem. You know what, though? Activism ceases to be useful when it starts hurting marginalized people rather than helping them. I’m not interested in doing activism for its own sake; I want to do the kinds of activism that will change things. And pushing myself to do things I can’t do because some self-righteous people will yell at me if I don’t… well, I don’t see that changing anything at all.
