shoutout to my mutuals that I don’t really talk to y’all still cool
Explaining your mental illness to others is a tough balancing act. You want them to believe you, but you also don’t want them to start treating you as subhuman because of it.
I wish it didn’t have to be like that.
Always interesting to see which posts of mine blow up. I have to admit, I never expected this one to; it was just an off-the-cuff vent.
I guess it’s one that lots of people identify with. And that, to me, is really sad. :( And it’s something that needs to change.
A bit of advice for friends of depressed/anxious/etc. people (not just me, but anyone):
Sometimes, what we need is to be talked through a situation. Not berated, or told to cheer up, or told it’s “not that bad”… but to be helped through some of the practical considerations that may not always be obvious when we’re freaking out or self-hating.
For example, a friend just helped remind me that I could make oatmeal. When I was freaking out at her about how I didn’t have anything I could eat right away, she helped me go through a list of what I had, and figure out what I could cook at my current spoon level. As a result, I was able to eat and feel a little better.
Another example: Some of you remember how, way back in May 2011, I finally reached the transition-or-die breaking point, which physically manifested as me freezing/trembling in the middle of class in front of everybody. I was fortunate, then, to have a school instructor who helped talk me through the situation and who helped create the beginnings of a plan of action for coming out at school. This then snowballed into coming out at work and getting my name change process started, and I’ve been living as my lady self “full-time” ever since.
Notice how there was no minimizing of the situation, no attempts to tell me that I was “blowing things out of proportion” or whatever. It was more, “Okay, let’s look at the practical situation, and see what we can do.” That sort of help can be invaluable to a person as anxiety-prone/depression-prone as I am.
girls being kept out of the sciences and pushed into the humanities; the humanities being valued less in our society than the sciences; and the humanities and sciences being looked at as stark opposites that couldn’t possibly be enjoyed for the same reasons are all problems that need to in some degree be tackled together
FUN HISTORY FACT
it used to be that the arts and humanities (at least in western cultures) were GIRLY THINGS FOR GIRLS, but at one point they started being masculinized so like poets would say that apollo was inspiring them or whatever instead of, you know, the all-female muses
MEANWHILE AT THE SAME TIME
science was always considered a masculine art, but the “scientific muse” became a woman around the time the lit muse became a man
and then it reversed again after women started doing things like hosting scientific salons and shit
science and the humanities have always been gendered, what gender they are has changed over time
and it’s always been weighted in favor of what men are thought to be best at at the time
honestly i applaud all girls who tell gross strange men to f*ck off but dnt feel ashamed if u can’t bring yourself to bc basically you’re taking the chance of “this guy might stab me for this” which is fairly plausible given history + Power dynamics so, like, dnt turn ur nose ^^^ at ppl who have a harder time with that